I only have two finals this semester and they are both take homes. Man do I hate those. Anyway, for the exceptionally bored, I’ll update my status as things progress. FYI, the top one is due Tues. 5pm and the bottom one Fri. 5pm.

Update 4-28-06 1:00pm Finally kicked the last item out the door so I’m done for the semester, and in reality done with classes for ever. Time for a little bike tune-up and then I’m hitting the Tech Trails for the afternoon.

For those who don’t see me on a regular basis, this is what my melon currently looks like.

I did that about three weeks ago but I didn’t any pictures floating around since it looked positively retarded. Now it has drastically improved as my hair is growing out a bit. I figured I may as well toss this up here to avoid shocking people when I start showing up at functions outside of the UP (read: weddings and stuff).

Today is senior walk. For those non-MTU alumni (poor bastards), senior walk is when all the seniors have a beer at EVERY SINGLE BAR in the Houghton/Hancock area. Unfortunately, I was hitting the books at the walk’s inception (2pm), but as I write this, my usual crew is across the street at the Uphill 41 (I hate that place so I’ll meet up with them when they leave there). Anyway, in honor of the occasion, I present The Modern Drunkard’s 40 Things Every Drunkard Should Do Before He Dies. I’m up to 14 of them complete (not that I’m making this a mission or anything), but #6 is going to be a problem though, since that person is still alive . . . . But, Read and heed. Cheers.

Just a quick shot of my new thruster warmning up prior to a test. Been doing this a lot lately . . .

I made the first trip to the Emergency Room of the 2006 biking season yesterday. For once, it was actually on my own behalf. What did I do? This:

Now you’re clearly thinking, “those don’t look like anything too serious”, and you’re right, they’re not (though the pictures were taken several days later). It is on the inside where my ailment stems from. Let’s back up to last Thursday around 9-10 pm. Makela drops by the house and wants to know if I’m game for going out for a beer. It was pretty early and I was putting the finishing touches on a rather unsuccessful week in the lab so I figured what the hell. I grab my bike and head outside. Rather then going down “the driveway”, I opt for the slightly more interesting trip down my seldom used sidewalk hoping the dominating the few stairs at the bottom will give me a little extra boost in biking competence. Hahahahahahah. Nope. The combination of slippery grass and my new, super inflated back tire spelled disaster. Over the handlebars I go landing squarely on the concrete hitting the steps I had intended to though not with my bike so much as with my body. Makela sees this and is amazed at how I managed to screw up so bad in like 30 feet. Anyway, I jump up and get back on that temptress of pain and continued on my way. In a truly phenomenal demonstration of unparalleled mastery of two wheels, I crashed again three blocks later. This second chance at death was much less serious since it only involved a sideways sliding on the side walk (again a casualty of the new tire). By this time though, after two wipeouts in less then a minute, I’m bound and determined to make it to the bar. I succeed in my task and for the balance of the evening mange to stay upright on my bike despite deteriorating conditions.

Fast forward to Saturday evening, I’m attending Adam Bike’s senior barrel at Sig Tau’s and I’m really having mustering a pain free breath. In fact, by the time I call it quits and bike home with Marc, the left side of my chest is really starting to hurt with anything beyond trivial movement (though luckily biking doesn’t hurt at all). After an evening of painful tossing and turning in my otherwise comfortable bed, I decide it may be time to seek some help. Being the enterprising individual I am, I first consult Dr. Google to get a feel for what I’m likely up against. Short of a collapsed lung, it is probably a broken rib that has been creating so much joy for me.

Despite my deeply held religious believes, the labored breathing was really beginning to piss me off, so I again I return to the saddle of my bike, and peddle my ass up to the Emergency Room. I arrive there, chain my bike to the big red “Emergency” sign outside and enter the sterile environment that causes my toxic waste dump of a body to instantly react with a survival instinct that could only be described as more pain. Anyway, long story short, after an hour and some high energy photons (x-rays) it is quite clear one of my ribs is going to need some downtime. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get a copy of the x-ray’s to hang on the fridge. However, what really made for a happy Easter was for some relief from the pain. For those who’ve never had a broken rib, don’t do it; it hurts, a lot. Luckily though, they slipped me some pretty sweet drugs – 500 mg Anexsia which I’m supposed to take 1-2 every 6 hours. For those who aren’t into powerful narcotics, Anexsia is just a fancy marketing name for the hydrocodone class of drugs basically derived from opium. Wikipedia has all sorts of interesting stuff on it.

Put it this way, work was interesting. I can still function no problem, but things are just a little more amusing. The fascinating part about using this is as a pain killer is that it doesn’t really get rid of the pain, you’re just too high to really give a damn. The down side though, is it is very effective at putting me to sleep . . . . .

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rat’tlkkhjam5’l;hmahk;trdlhdfgsdga;lkjm4lkm32asv
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*drool*

—no carrier—

Those were the words of wisdom proffered forth by my scuba instructor this evening during the classroom section of the class. The thought there is that if you’re sitting on the surface of the water in sunlight with fins and stuff on, from below your silhouette looks like a seal. To set our minds at ease though, he said the shark would only take one bite and spit you out because neoprene tastes nothing like seal. Scuba diving is so awesome though (even though we’re still only in the dive tank on campus). The really great part though, is if you pony up $15 per semester and join the MTU Aquanauts you can check out all the scuba equipment you need whenever you want to. So this summer, Brad, Mack and I will be exploring the depths around the Keweenaw looking at all the nifty ships that just couldn’t quite handle the seas as well as my kayak can and settled to their watery grave.

What has fast become amazing is my ability to breathe through my mouth underwater. Understand, I hate breathing through my mouth . . . I never do it, even when I’m sick. I was actually really nervous that’d I’d just freak out since the mask you wear only gets sucked to your face when you attempt to inhale through your nose, but luckily it hasn’t really been a problem. Well, tonight I got a bit nervous but I caught myself before it became anywhere near an issue. You see, for the last two weeks I’ve been wearing my wetsuit to keep warmer in the dive tank. Last week (the first week with it on), I was having trouble getting negatively buoyant enough to get to the bottom and stay there so tonight, Lundy (the instructor), loaded me up with more then double the weights I had previously been using. Yeah, I sunk like a rock. So I was standing on the floor in 14 feet of water sort of wondering if I’d actually be able to get buoyant enough to make it back up to the top without taking of my weight belt. Luckily, it wasn’t really too much of an issue, but I still really didn’t float all that well and had to keep my regulator in my mouth almost the whole time. Not a big deal, but it was only my third time having all the gear but it was actually good practice in keeping your cool which probably the most important thing when diving. I mean, we practice doing all sorts of things like taking your mask off, simulating breathing through a broken regulator and stuff like that. So I guess this is just another notch in the stick.

Anyway . . . been a long a few days in the lab, so I’m off to bed.

Who knew the Onion would have nailed this one over a year ago . . .
Bush Announces Iraq Exit Strategy

This is the cover of the publication that is going out to all the incoming freshmen. I’ll be signing autographs at tomorrow at noon for $40 a pop.

The really amusing part though is there is over 21 years of combined college experience represented in that picture. Oh the irony.