I left the lab early today, that of course being a relative term, but had I stayed I certainly would have sustained the usual 1st to 2nd degree burns from handling a thruster that is still too hot; a situation that reeks of desperation though we’ll just call it “justified academic collateral damage”.

To be honest, the experimental stuff is not going so well these days due to a dizzying array of problems, but after 4.5 years and over 300 thruster tests I know my methods aren’t the problem. Rather “the problem” is the problem. The results of turbo hot temperatures and high voltages yield at best an awkward party with light beer and tequila and at worst a strange competition between a suicide note and a dissertation. But alas therein is the true problem - at some point I need to get on with my life - a sentiment shared by most rational humans familiar with my research. Others might have me continue to what end I know not but it would seem that the current trend in academia necessitates a “victory” at all costs neglecting the fact that there is often more to be learned during the buildup than a synthetic success. To that end, during my thesis proposal defense I suggested the concept of the Phyrric Victory:

A Pyrrhic victory (IPA: /’pɪr ɪk/ -) is a victory with devastating cost to the victor.

“The armies separated; and, it is said, Pyrrhus replied to one that gave him joy of his victory that one more such victory would utterly undo him”. (Dionysius 280 B.C. via Wikipedia)

What prompted this surfacing from the abyss? Three reasons: first, I’m clearly frustrated by the never ending war of attrition with the laws of physics and metuallurgy. Second, however this story turns out I want to document with some amount of posterity the pivotal moments in my life. And finally I need to finish stat or the one job I actually wanted will evaporate and thus the plight of Pyrrhus will come to fruition yet again.

What am I saying here? Not sure but I’ve had a lot of success with my research in the early days but things changed but now the hour grows late and the path has strayed further than anyone would have guessed.